Glazed Looks and God.

Journal Entry

Distracted. Glazed looks. Waiting for you to take a breath so they can talk.  How many times in a day or week, does someone ask, how you are doing, and really want to know?   If you are like me you can probably count them on one one hand, if that.

If you deal with lupus, you are at an even greater disadvantage. You probably have extended family members who have no idea what your life with lupus is like. Friends who act as though there is nothing wrong with you. People living in the same home as you do, who need to have the symptoms explained to them time and time again.

Where do you go when people can’t understand you or your pain?  Who or what do you turn to then? Many medicate themselves with food, shopping, alcohol etc. Others feel sorry for themselves and withdraw. Still others, get caught up in the culture, constantly searching for ways to fill the void.

Unfortunately, none of those things satisfy over the long-term, and can even make matters worse. A person can feel like they are aimlessly drifting through life with no direction, no security, and in some cases, no value.  I think you would agree, this in not a good place to be.

In the last journal entry, I wrote about the many people who were there for me, anchors to help stabilize me, during as especially precarious time in my life.  As time went on, I discovered  people would not always be there for me,   they could not always meet the needs I had or they had their own pressing needs.

I did discover, as I grew in my relationship with God, that He was always available.   He cared about my plight and He could offer stability. I learned to connect with God through His Word-the Bible, and through prayer-talking to Him.  I have discovered over the years, that He is very responsive when I seek Him.  He manages to find all kinds of ways to speak to me.  Sometimes through the Bible, a song, a friend, a child, a sermon, an email, my thoughts etc.

It should be easier to trust in God, who is able, to meet all of our needs, instead of people who often fall short of meeting them.(Phil.4:19).  He longs to be THE Anchor in our life-the One that keeps us from possibly drifting out to  sea.

People  fail us and will continue to do so. Likewise, we will fail the people in our lives.  People will misunderstand us and what we are going through, but take heart, there is Someone who cares for us, longs to hear our voice(Song of Solomon 2:14) and have us put our trust in HIM. (Psalm 118:8) He will not misunderstand us, tune us out or shut us off. No glazed looks with God. (Click here for more on trusting in God.)

Many blessings to you…Leslie Rose K

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7 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Brenda on October 25, 2011 at 11:44 AM

    I have always had to lean on God because I always knew he was the only one that was always there for me. Yes, people are there for me, but not in the way that God has always been there for me. I learned this when I was three years old and have been this way since then. I do have friends that truly care about me and when they ask how I’m doing it is because they truly want to know. My family is a whole other ballgame. lol Sometimes they get it but more often than not they don’t. But I get that, it is hard to understand unless you are living it. I am so blessed and grateful for all the blessings in my life and I know that Lupus isn’t easy but I also know that God will see me through it, that there will be better days without sickness and pain in Heaven. So I cling to that thought and move forward!! Thanks for another great post Leslie!

    Reply

  2. Beautiful!

    I find, also, that when I keep the perspective you describe, I no longer feel upset with others. No human can be all things to another. There is that place in everyone that remains for God alone.

    Thank you for this post to take with me in heart today.

    Peace.

    Reply

  3. Right now I am having a hard time to get my family to understand. I am going through a very severe flareup and hurt everywhere. How do you explain this to your wife when she is going though lots of pain also. I don’t want to take the focus off of her but I feel that she thinks I am ignoring her pain which I am not. It’s almost like she brushes me off at times thinking I am describing my pain as if it were a contest to get her to care for me. It’ s not that I am ignoring her pain it is just that when I get these severe flareups it is hard to listen to others. I have to give her lots of credit though, she seems to push through the pain much better that I.

    Reply

    • Lou You are in a difficult situation. First for being a man dealing with lupus and second for having a wife with health issues. It takes a lot of understanding on both parts, not always easy to do when you yourself are hurting. Personally, I do try to remind my family how I am feeling, often I go to a quite place and pour my heart out to God. You would be surprised how that helps. Hang in there Lou the flare will pass. My prayers are with you. It was good to hear from you.

      Reply

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